I've Never
by Emis
Summary: Naruto is bored so he decides to host a game night at his house. "I'v never and truth or dare and many more no wait just those two." shonen-ai NaruSasu IruKaka soon with GaaNeji!
1. insert title here

Disclaimer: Naruto and co. don't belong to me or else Sakura would not exist and Sasuke and Naruto would have followed up their kiss with some wonderful boy smut!   
  
Warnings: This will have some shonen-ai between Kakashi and Iruka and Naruto and Sasuke. So if you don't like don't read it! Oh and flames will be used to burn Orochimaru! (glomps Orochimaru)  
  
Carlos: No she won't use flames to burn Orochimaru.  
  
Emis: Yeah I know. (hehe glomps Orochimaru more)  
  
This fic is dedicated to my friend Danielle! Yah go Danny!!! (glomps her too) ehehe.  
  
Rating: for now it's PG-13 but next chapter will be most definitely be R though still not sure.  
  
I've Never  
  
Sasuke's POV  
  
I took another swig of sake. There were screaming girls and groaning guys. I looked to my right and saw Naruto in all his orange goodness. Next to him sat the pink haired wench, Haruno Sakura all giddy. Next sat Ino. After Ino slouched the laziest ass ever, Shikamaru. Closely after sat the green spandex loving, fuzzy eyebrow, over energetic, Rock Lee. Next to Lee sat, I still don't know how Naruto managed to drag THEM here, Iruka and Kakashi. I noticed them at the same time because Iruka seems to have crawled into Kakashi's lap along time ago. Iruka and Kakashi were right next to me due since we were in a circle. We were playing the fun-though I would never admit it out loud- drinking game I've never.  
  
How may you ask did I, Uchiha Sasuke, get dragged-literately- into playing this game with all these people at Naruto's house?  
  
It all started this morning.  
  
  
This morning (normal pov)  
  
It was a bright and sunny day in Konoha. It was around twelve in the afternoon. Team 7 was at their usual meeting place, the bridge. They had been there since their meeting time, nine.  
  
"Kuso! Where is our perverted sensei?!" Naruto yelled pacing back and forth fuming.  
  
Their sensei, Kakashi, was late again for the hundredth time.  
  
"Naruto no baka! Stop pacing it's giving me a headache." pink hair witch, um I mean Sakura yelled massaging her wide forehead.(1) Her eyes turned to where Sasuke stood leaning against a tree. Her eyes became little green hearts. She walked over stopping in front of the unusually quiet boy.  
  
"Hi Sasuke-kun!. What do you think about Kakashi being late again?" the green eyed girl said.  
  
"Hn." was all Sasuke responded his eyes closed trying to give the girl to go away by ignoring her. It didn't work to his liking.  
  
The stupid oblivious girl took that as a sign to start a very long annoying one-sided conversation. Sasuke looked away from her to the now fuming blonde sitting on the ground pouting.  
  
Just then there was a small noise and in a puff of smoke appeared Kakashi.  
  
"Yo." he said raising up two fingers. His visible eye curved upwards into a half crescent moon.  
  
"You're late!" Naruto and Sakura yell pointing accusing fingers at their sensei.  
  
It was ritual Kakashi would come hours late Naruto and Sakura would scream "your late" and then he would give them a half assed excuse and they would yell or mutter "liar".  
  
Kakashi has to stop himself from sighing or laughing. "I went dolphin riding and got too caught up."  
  
"Liar." Naruto and Sakura said in unison.  
  
Sasuke shook his head and smiled to himself knowing about a certain schoolteacher dolphin Kakashi might be 'riding'.  
  
"SOooo" Naruto said tapping his foot impatiently.  
  
"So what?" Kakashi asked managing to look sheepish.  
  
"So what mission do we have today?!" Naruto screamed letting his anger fly.  
  
"Oh that we don't have a mission today." his one eye drooping slightly giving the impression he's either stoned or lacking sleep.(oh yeah cause we know Iruka's been keeping him awake . I'm gonna tell his mom! Oooohhhh!)  
  
Naruto and Sakura fell over. Sasuke barely held himself up.  
  
"Nani?!" Naruto yelled his voice a pitch normal people don't have. Kakashi cringed at the voice.  
  
"You made us wait here for two hours and then you show up with no freaking mission?!"(2) Naruto yelled, somehow managing to tower over Kakashi with murder in his eyes.  
  
Kakashi cowered at the look the loudmouth ninja was giving him.  
  
"Um.. yeah?" Kakashi said scratching the back of his head with one hand.  
  
"I'm seriously gonna murder you!" Naruto yelled lunging forward.  
  
"Meep! Bye!" Kakashi said before quickly disappearing in a puff of smoke leaving Naruto to grab nothing but air.  
  
"Kuso Kakashi-sensei come back here!" Naruto yelled.  
  
"Shut up dobe." Sasuke said calmly as ever. Not showing that his ears were permanently damaged seconds ago by Naruto's voice. "What has gotten into you?"  
  
"None of your business Sasuke-baka." Naruto huffed before crossing his arms over his chest and sitting on the ground.  
  
"What is it baka?" Sasuke persisted. It wasn't usually that affected the orange clad ninja this much.  
  
"If you must know I . . . am bored." Naruto wailed.  
  
Now Sasuke fell over.  
  
"Nani?" Sasuke had been expecting a long explanation about something- terrible happening, nut not that. Just then Sakura being the little interrupting bitch she is decided it was the perfect time to come over.  
  
"I know Naruto why don't you play a game?" Sakura suggested.  
  
"Yes! Game night at my house!" he yelled shooting up. He grabbed Sasuke's hand and ran dragging him towards the direction of Iruka-sensei's house. Sasuke was in a daze not really knowing what was going on.  
  
While going to Iruka's house they met with Shikamaru and Ino. Shikamaru was looking at the clouds while Ino was trying to talk to him.  
  
"Hey game night at my house. Come it will be fun!" Naruto screamed not really stopping.  
  
After that they saw Rock lee running around in little circles.  
  
"Come to my house to play games!" Naruto yelled not stopping again.  
  
Naruto finally stopped in front of Iruka-sensei's house. He bounced right in not bothering to knock.  
  
There is giggling coming from the living room.  
  
"Iruka-sensei!" Naruto yelled.  
  
The giggling stopped followed by a loud thud.  
  
Naruto dragged Sasuke into the living room. On the floor lay a very red Iruka. Hovering above him his arms slightly out was Kakashi. His one eye widened for a second before dropping in an irritated scowl. Thought you really couldn't tell. Both were looking at the new comers.  
  
"Kakashi-sensei what are you doing to Iruka-sensei? Naruto yelled putting his hands on his hips. (He was still holding Sasuke's so one of Sasuke's too.)  
  
"Um. . . Naruto . . .I . . can. . explain?" Iruka stuttered from the ground so very red.  
  
Kakashi just grinned under his mask.  
  
"I told you; Iruka can't fight a jounin like you! So stop attacking him!"  
  
Sasuke snickered but stuffed his fist into his mouth to muffle the noise.  
  
"Nani Sasuke-baka?" Naruto said turning to him.  
  
"I think Iruka likes to get attacked by Kakashi." Sasuke said behind his fist.  
  
Iruka gaped and only reddened more. Kakashi giggled.  
  
Naruto stared Kakashi giggles?! o.O  
  
"Any who!" Naruto yelled quite loudly. "Iruka and Kakashi-sensei you are to go to my house to play games!"  
  
"Um ok sure what games?" Iruka asked. Kakashi just sat there thinking up excuses not to go.  
  
"I've Never and truth or dare and many more! Wait no only those two." he said scratching the back of his head a grin plastered on his face.  
  
"Um sure we'll make it, right Kakashi?" Iruka asked kicking Kakashi really hard in the shin. Kakashi whimpered and nodded.  
  
"Ok then its settled come over in like ten minutes." Naruto said before dragging Sasuke out again and running towards his place.

  
  
Ok that was the first chapter. yah I feel so good! This is my first Naruto fic oh and this is my very first humor fic so um please review or send me an email at yukisloveryahoo.com. Like it, hate it, want me to continue, want to kill me? I know this chapter isn't really funny but it will get better I hope. please review or send me an email telling me! Please just put 'meep' and I will be happy or 'sucks shit' or something equally nice and I will appreciate it.   
  
[1] I hate Sakura so I'm gonna bad mouth her so much in this fic! So I apologize to all Sakura fans. wait there are Sakura fans?!?!? o.O If your a Sakura fan you must be on drugs!!!! oh well any who.

[2] naruto may be stupid and angry but not that stupid to curse infront of a teacher like that. or mabey he is? (ponders this)lol

Oh yeah there is line from one of my fave animes in this fic! If you can guess which one I'll give you the next chapter before everyone else! Just email me leaving your answer. I'll give you a hint! (hands you hint!) lol j/king the clue is "Furuba!"  
  
Ok signing of for now!, Emis!  
  
(shameless advertising) Please go read my Harry Potter fic! Its called Eerie! thank you for bearing with me! 


	2. First Game

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or co. If you haven't gotten that in your, head you're crazier than I am.

Warning: There will be Shounen-ai in this chapter. That means boy on boy love. There will be drinking, cursing (not that much), and suggestive themes in here. In other words, the Naruto characters are going to get drunk. Oh, and that is going to make this OOC but only in places where I think is right.

Rating: It will remain PG-13 I hope, not really.

To all my wonderful reviewers I thank you for bothering to give me constructive criticism and/or praise. I thank you all! I apologize to all you unfortunate people that had to read my horrible work. I can and will explain. When I wrote and typed the first chapter I was high on coffee, sugar, several alcoholic beverages, and some thingy I found on my floor. I was also sleep deprived. In the last days I've slept 3 hours each day and drank 15 cups of coffee. I'm not kidding. So again I so very apologize to you poor unfortunate readers. That is why I was so horrible. I'm not saying I'm great, but I'm saying that I'm not that horrible is all. See this paragraph sucks! That is because I can't write but I still do because I want to get better so thank you! Oh and I also thank you if you read my ranting and babbling in this paragraph. Hmm I bet I'm going to get an ulcer when I'm 20, crap. T-T I'm still a bit out of it but I'm better I slept for 8 hours, straight! Go me!!!!!! And I have a beta, my friend Dani!

Like I said this fic is dedicated to my friend, Dani! (glomp) Oh, and one more thing. I hope you all (who read this) aren't too offended by my horrible attempt at humor! This is my first ever humor fic. EVER! Ok now on with the story! 

I've Never 2 Sasuke and Naruto arrived at Naruto's apartment in record time. Naruto opened the door and went inside, throwing his keys on the floor. Shedding his jacket off, Naruto plopped down on a slightly torn couch and put his feet on a small coffee table that was in front of it. Sasuke looked around the apartment. It was just like he imagined it would be. Ramen cups littered the floor, the counter, and just about everywhere else. The sink was full of dirty pots and pans. On the couch where Naruto was laying there were several clothes and various other items. Sasuke just stood where he was, looking around with a smirk on his face.

"You have a messy apartment."

"Yeah I do." Naruto responded, looking around and shrugging. "Well, we better get everything ready!"

"We?"

"Can't you help me?" Sasuke sent him glares.

Naruto got up; he grabbed the coffee table and moved it to the end of the room, shoving several things lying on the floor along with it. When he had a small area of the living room clean, he went into the kitchen and opened a bottom cupboard. From inside he took three bottles of sake.

"Where did you get sake? Dobe, did you steal it?" Sasuke said with raised eyebrows.

"Not really...a drunken guy gave them to me." Naruto shrugged again. Sasuke sighed, shaking his head.

Naruto set the bottles on the space of floor he had cleared in his living room. Then, he went back into the kitchen to get mugs; he set those down next to the bottles. Just then, there was a knock on the door. Naruto jumped up and ran to get it. On the doorway stood Sakura, Ino, and Shikamaru.

Sakura and Ino pushed past Naruto when they spotted Sasuke. They practically ran towards him, pushing each other in the process. Sasuke shook his head and leaned on the counter, ignoring the bickering girls.

"Ino-pig, Sasuke-kun doesn't like you, he likes me!" Sakura shrieked when they stopped in front of said Uchiha.

"You think Sasuke-kun likes your wide forehead, Sakura-wide-forehead?" Ino smirked evilly at the girl.

Sakura's hands flew to her forehead immediately, "Shut up Ino-pig."

The girls continued their shouting over Sasuke, who obviously didn't want anything to do with either of them.

'Why the hell can't they shut the fuck up?!' Sasuke thought angrily, his left eye twitching slightly.

Naruto started after the girls, but then remembered he had another guest still standing at the door. He turned to the black-haired boy.

"Hey Shikamaru, come in." Naruto exclaimed excitedly, jumping so that the boy could enter. Shikamaru entered, mumbling something that sounded like, "how bothersome."

Naruto closed the door, and was going to show Shikamaru where to sit when loud rapid knocking interrupted him. Naruto opened the door and there stood Rock Lee in all his spandex and legwarmer loving-ness.

"Hey Lee, come on in!" Naruto squealed excitedly. He had never had so many people over at his house.

Naruto showed them to the living room where they were going to sit. Lee sat down excitedly next to a grumbling Shikamaru. Lee turned to Shikamaru and started a very long and bothersome conversation about exercise and the wonders of spandex. (1)

'Oh god, why can't he shut up?! What is he even talking about? This is so bothersome. Damn Ino for dragging me here.' Shikamaru thought, sighing heavily. Lee didn't notice the lack of conversation from the dark haired teen.

Naruto went over to where Sakura and Ino were yelling. Sasuke wasn't even looking at them. He had his head turned away from them with his eyes closed. A small vein popped out on his forehead and his jaw was clenched tightly.

"Hey, what about me? I'm still single, fight over me!" Naruto shouted, a grin on his face, though on the inside he was thinking, 'He will never like either of you!'

The girls didn't seem to notice him, or bother to. Naruto's grin disappeared and his face was visible sadness. Even his blonde quills seemed to droop a little before all was well and his smile came back. Naruto glared at Sasuke for no apparent reason. Sasuke caught him glaring so naturally glared back. Naruto opened his mouth to yell something at the raven-haired boy when there was knocking again. Naruto closed his mouth and went to answer the door. Outside stood a happy Iruka and an obviously irritated Kakashi.

"Iruka-sensei!" Naruto yelled and a bit of ceiling fell.

"Hi Naruto." Iruka said elbowing Kakashi in the ribs. Kakashi nodded towards him in greeting. (2) Naruto bounced out of the way so that they could enter.

Iruka walked in and noticed Sasuke, Sakura, Ino, Lee, and Shikamaru. Kakashi staggered in behind him. His one eye drooped even more so that it was almost closed.

Naruto sniffed the air and realization struck him. "He's drunk?"

"Um, yeah." Iruka replied, a bit awkwardly.

"Oh, ok. Then it will be ok for us to drink." Naruto grinned. Just then Sakura went over to him and punched him.

"What the hell?! You invited Kakashi and Iruka-sensei?!!" She screamed, punching him. Though when she saw the two older ones staring at her, she turned to smile at them innocently.

"It's ok, it'll be fine." Though deep down Naruto didn't trust a drunk Kakashi so close to Iruka. 'Who knows what he might do!' "Ok, now that everyone is here, let's start! Everyone come sit on the floor."

They did as they were told, some less willing than others. (coughsasukecough) Naruto sat down on Sasuke's right.

"Hn." Sasuke said as Naruto sat down next to him.

"Ok, Sasuke will start first, and then me, and so on and so forth." Naruto said, hoping to embarrass the Uchiha.

"Hn." Sasuke grumbled but decided to play along in hopes of embarrassing Naruto. "I've never been hated by an entire village."

"Argh Sasuke-baka!" Naruto growled, filling his mug and drinking. Everyone else filled his or her mugs. Kakashi was going to drink his, but Iruka saw him.

"Not yet, Kashi!" Iruka said slapping his hand. Kakashi pouted but put his mug down.

"My turn! I've never been chased by a horde of rabid fan girls." Naruto had his vulpine grin on.

"Hn," was all Sasuke said before taking a swig of his drink. To everyone's surprise Kakashi also drank. They all stared, except Iruka.

"What? I was a heartthrob when I was younger." He said, and then lowered his voice so only Iruka could hear. "And I still am." Iruka blushed at he comment directed at him. No one noticed what was going on with the teachers.

"My turn. I've never peed standing up," Sakura giggled. All the boys drank, obviously.

"I've never dyed my hair," Ino smirked looking pointedly at Sakura. Muttering something that sounded like 'pig,' Sakura drank. Sasuke and Kakashi also drank. Naruto, Sakura, and Ino's eyes nearly popped out. Sasuke just shrugged indifferently.

"I've never had any motivation to work," Shikamaru said.

Everyone drank.

"I've never gotten tired," Lee exclaimed, tone very proud-like. Everyone drank, again.

"I've never listened to any boy bands," Kakashi slurred, badly.

Sakura, Ino, and Lee drank. Everyone looked at Lee, even Shikamaru.

"It's great work out music!" Many eyebrows were raised at the comment.

"I've never worn pink," Iruka said a bit slurred as well. (3)

Sakura, Ino and Shikamaru drank.

"Don't ask." Shikamaru shuddered.

Naruto snorted. Shikamaru glared at him.

They played for about an hour, and they were all pretty trashed. So far they had discovered that Sasuke wore a thong and high heels. Naruto has put make-up on, worn women's clothes, and kissed a dog. Sakura has had braces and stuffed her bra. Ino has eaten off the floor, stuffed her bra, and seen her grandma naked. Shikamaru has worn pink, worn a dress, and has been harassed by a 50-year-old lady. Lee has streaked and gone skinny-dipping. Kakashi has seen his parents have sex, seen cows have sex, and has been chased by a pig. (4) Iruka hasn't really done anything.

"Oh ok, my turn! I've never worn fuzzy feet pajamas to sleep." Sasuke slurred badly.

Naruto, Sakura, and Ino drank. They were all too drunk to care enough to ask.

"Ok my turn. I've never had sex!" Naruto stated so proudly. Kakashi, Iruka, Shikamaru, and Lee drank. Or course they **weren't** drunk enough to let **that** pass.

"I was harassed," Shikamaru stated.

"I had sex with a hooker," Lee said excitedly. Everyone stared.

"Uh...ok...I've never..." Sakura's eyelids drooped and she passed out.

Naruto saw her; and in his drunken state thought it was the funniest thing ever. He laughed until he fell over. Sasuke raised a slender brow and kicked him.

"Shut up, dobie." Sasuke said. It took him a minute to get what he had snapped. When he finally realized the comment said, he laughed his head off. "Dobie...what a stupid thing to say."

Naruto, who was nursing his bruising arm, kicked him. The kick shut Sasuke up. Ino passed out, her head thumping the floor loudly.

"I guess it's my turn. I've never made out with my own sex, uh... twice." Shikamaru said, holding up three shaky fingers.

Kakashi, Iruka, and Sasuke drank. Before anyone could ask, Sasuke held up his hand.

"Curiosity killed the Uchiha." His Sharingan activated. "No, more like Itachi killed the Uchiha." He roared.

"Uh, before anything happens, I'm next. I've never fallen in love with my best friend." Lee said.

Sasuke and Naruto drank.

'Damn I wonder who his best friend is,' Everyone conscious thought.

"I've never made out with a girl!" Kakashi giggled loudly, falling over. (5)

Iruka drank.

Kakashi stared, and then burst out crying hysterically. "Waa, Iruka likes the vagina!" Kakashi cried, his shoulders shaking badly. His visible eye spilling tears comically.

"Shh, Baby, it was once and it meant nothing." Iruka cooed. He placed his hands on the older man's shoulders, looking him in the face, or what could be seen of it.

"Really?!" Kakashi said while rubbing his nose with the back of his hand.

"Yeah." Before anyone knew what was going on, Iruka was being pulled on top of a very happy and drunk Kakashi to be snogged senseless. Kakashi's mask was in his left hand, and his right arm was wrapped around Iruka's waist, pulling him closer. Iruka's hands were kneading themselves in Kakashi's silver hair. Both of them kissed the other with drunken passion. Kakashi sipped his tongue into Iruka's mouth, Iruka sucking on the older man's tongue gently. Kakashi moaned against the schoolteacher's mouth. Kakashi's right hand, which had previously been around the younger man's waist, made its way down his back to land on his ass. Kakashi squeezed the left cheek gently, yet meaningful. Iruka blushed at the request.

Naruto's eyes were bugged out, his hands on either side of his face, and his mouth agape in a silent scream. Sasuke looked to him with mild amusement, his smirk returned and his Sharingan gone.

"Bonehead, you should have known they were together; it was so obvious." Sasuke shot at Naruto, though looking at the two men kissing.

"They are together?!" Naruto screamed. Sasuke sighed, exasperated.

"Yes."

"Oh, well, that wasn't what I was shocked about...but now I am." Sasuke raised both eyebrows.

"It's that Kakashi has his mask off!" Naruto pointed at Kakashi's left hand where he clutched said mask. Sasuke stared too.

"Ooh, we get to see Kakashi-sensei's face." Sasuke drawled sarcastically, though he really did want to see.

Naruto, Sasuke, and Shikamaru crept closer to try to get a glimpse of the usually masked face. When they were a foot away from the kissing couple, they noticed that Lee wasn't with them. They turned around and saw Lee in a conveniently placed dark corner. He was doing God knows what, though anyone could bet they wished he (God) didn't.

They shuddered uncontrollably, then shrugged it off and continued on their 'journey'. They were really close now, but before they could see anything, Iruka's hair came lose. The hair fell around both of their faces. (6)

"Fuck." Naruto muttered trying to look. Sasuke also grumbled. Shikamaru just looked bored.

They crept closer, almost touching the moaning and kissing couple. A second later, Iruka pulled back abruptly. They were done making out. Kakashi's mask was in place before anyone knew what was going on.

The boys jumped apart, startled and upset.

"Aww, we were gonna see his face!" Naruto pouted, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

Everyone sat at their appropriate seats.

Naruto spotted Ino and Sakura lying on the floor, unconscious. He went over to the kitchen and filled a large pot with water. With a grin, he dumped it over the sleeping girls. The instant the water was splashed on them, they woke up sputtering. He accidentally got Sasuke drenched too. Naruto looked at him with a grin, though it was a big mistake. Sasuke's shirt was clinging to him, and his rock hard abs was showing through the wet material of his shirt.

Naruto couldn't take his eyes off of Sasuke's abs. Nobody knew, but Naruto had a secret fetish for abs. By now, Naruto was drooling slightly.

'I wonder how his abs would feel under my fingers.' Naruto thought. 'What?! Did I just think that?!!' He shook his head to rid himself of those thoughts. He clapped his hands together,

"Well, now that everyone is awake we can play truth or dare!" He said, grinning and never taking his eyes off Sasuke.

Owari

.

(1) WTF?! Wonders of spandex?!

(2) Kakashi is irritated 'cause Iruka wouldn't give him any! And Iruka is being mean 'cause Naruto is like a little bro to him.

(3) Our dear schoolteacher can't hold his alcohol. He only drank like... twice. lol

(4) It seems Kakashi had a very disturbing childhood. (shudder)

(5)Remember, Kakashi has already drank, so he is PISS drunk! He is so super drunk, like you wouldn't believe!

(6) Let's just say that Iruka's hair grew?! (nervous chuckle) Ehehe.

Yes, I know there were a lot of numbers. Yes, I would be pissed too. (dodges flying objects) Ok, well you can review now! Tell me what you think! I don't mind flames. ('Well maybe a little.') Come, you know you want to review! Just click the little button! Oh yeah one more thing. I know that I too wayyyy too long to update. Hehe its just that between like 5 friends b-days plus my own and tennis lessons I found It a bit hard to write and type this.I finnally did get this out so umm yeah annnd If you review I could type faster!

Shameless advertising: Please go read my other fic! It's a Harry Potter one!

(Runs around screaming and smashes into a wall) That was for your entertainment! (passes out)


	3. Rainbow

Disclaimer:We claim no ownership for this anime so please don't sue.(Though I doubt any bigwigs are reading this.)

Warning:This chapter contains alcohol use, and some yaoi moments I think. In other words, it's a regular Emis fic.

Carlos:Alright folks you asked for it you got it. Just remember to say thank you.

"Ok now that everyone is awake we can play truth or dare. To make the game a bit more interesting there will be a few extra rules!" Naruto exclaimed yet still looking at a very wet,"sexy", and annoyed Sasuke.

"What kind of extra rules?" Lee asked, curious. Sakura and Ino groaned and slumped against each other for support.

"Instead of just truth or dare it will be truth, dare, double dare, or rainbow!" Naruto giggled evilly.

"Rainbow?" Everyone asked looking at Naruto with confused looks.

"If you pick rainbow, whoever is asking says a color and the person with the "dare" has to take off all the clothing they have of that color!" He explained exictedly."Ok let's begin! Sasuke go first."

"Ok, fine. Iruka-sensei truth,dare,double dare,or rainbow?" Sasuke turned his attention to his previous teacher.

"Uh double dare?" Iruka answered a bit shakily.

"Oh Iruka is courages!" Kakashi yelled punching the air with his fist.

"Ok I dare you to drink a whole bottle of sake and dance the macarena(1)." Sasuke gaily replied.

Iruka eyed the bottle of sake warily. He took it when it was shoved at him by a too excited Kakashi. He chugged for all he was worth. When he was done he put the bottle down his eyelids dropping badly. He got onto shaky legs try very hard not to get alcohol poisining, that and dieing.

He began singing and dancing the macarena song. His movements shaky and singing out of tune. Kakashi clapped,off beat too, along with Iruka. The poor drunk teacher fell into his lover's lap laughing maniaclly.

"er ok my turn." Naruto eyed Iruka being kissed-again-by Kakashi with drunken passion. "Sasuke truth,dare etcetera you know."

"I guess..." Sasuke pondered for a minute his eyes unfocused,"I'll go with rainbow?"

"Ok, navy blue!" Naruto exclaimed a bit too excited.

Sasuke removed his head band,shirt, and sandels. His bangs fell unto his eyes giving him more sex appeal(2) and his abs moved sensually with each breath he took.

Naruto could not take his eyes off of him. His face, his abs, his pants! The kyubi keeper could feel his own pants tightening. He tore his eyes away from the darkhaired boy cursing himself for being stupid.

Sakura and Ino were drooling profoundly and openly. Sasuke ignored them and their rush of saliva spilling from their mouths. Their eyes were glazed over.

Naruto snapped his fingers in front of their faces. This seemed to snap them out of their trance like state.

"Right my turn. Ok Naruto truth, dare, double dare and so on."

"Dare me,baby, Usumaki Naruto can do anything!" Naruto yelled a grin on his face.

"I dare you to stuff your mouth with marshmellows!"

"Uhhh ok." Naruto got up and stumbled into his kitchen looking in his drawers and cupboards finally came back with a bag of marshmellows. He ripped open the bag and began stuffing his face with mouthfulls of the delicious gooy food.

Everyone chanted "stuff stuff!" Sasuke was laughing. Sakura was watching Naruto's mouth with wide eyes while everyone else sweatdropped as he continued to stuff his mouth.

He threw the empty bag down, his mouth full, his cheeks puffed out. A small marshmellow popped out, Naruto pushed it back in with a finger.

Kakashi laughed and smacked his student's back playfully but a bit too hard. All of the gooy wet things burst from his mouth showering everyone.

Naruto sweatdropped seeing his friends and sensei covered in spit and parcially chewed food.

"Ehehehe oops!"

Kakashi was the only one not covered so he fell back laughing and pointing.

"Hahahaha you look soooo funny!"

Iruka gave him the best glare he could muster. Then proceeded to tackle the laughing jounin.

"You think it's funny?" Well eat this!" Iruka yelled on top of his lover's stomach stuffing his mouth with the soggy things.

Kakashi started choking between laughing and getting marshmellows stuffed into his mask. He satrted thrashing around trying to get an enraged Iruka off.

"Ack Iruka,darling,get off please." Kakahi wheezed. The now choking jounin rolled on top of his lover, but Iruka wasn't gonna give up easily. Soon they were just a pile of rolling limbs.

Sasuke stood up to stop them, but got sucked into the ball. Then Sakura, who had just been sitting there, got sucked in. Naruto, not being one to miss the fun, jumped in. Everyone else had nothing to do soooo they joined in too.

They were rolling around laughing and...rolling. They ran into a couch and with the speed and strength that they were rolling with crashed and "exploded". They were everywhere! Sasuke landed on the couch on top of Naruto. Sakura on the floor with Ino on top of her. Shikamaru was lying on top of Lee. Kakashi and Iruka were in their little corner on the floor making out crazily.(3)

Naruto opened his blue eyes and found himself staring at Sasuke's eyes. Sasuke's silky black hair tickling the sides of his face. They were soooo close. Naruto blushed.

"So close if I just lean in a little bit." Both boys thought.

They leaned in their lips almost touching...and a knock on the door.

"Damnnationnn!" Naruto thought springing apart from the darkhaired boy.

"Fuuuuuuuck!" Sasuke thought also springing apart from the blonde.

Naruto hurried over to the door, trying to fight down the blush that was overpowering his face.

The blonde ninja swung open the door to find none other than Neji and Hinata Hyuga.

Carlos:That's it for now oh and Emis left another note. Here it is:

Am I evil or just stupid?! O.O Ehhe yeah this chapter sucks ass totally! What can I say? I've been drinking sangrias again. Ehehehe. Those mofos are good. Oh and yeah while I was writing this I discovered I was crazy. So ummm yeah. Ok so I had originally was gonna make this the last chapter but I got lazy and didn't want to type the whole thing. Oh and also Neji or Hinata weren't suppose to be in here but I just had to put Neji in he's one of my favorite characters. So yeah Hinata just tagged along? Ok on with the numbers!!

(1) WTF?!? Boy am I crazy and stupid? .

(2) Can Sasuke get any more sex appeal!?! o.O

(3) You know Kakashi always wanting to make out. He's a pervert! (Well so am I heehee) and that's why we lurv him!!!

Ok. Well bye for now. Don't forget to review!! (I'll write faster!!)

Carlos:There you have it folks don't forget to review now. See ya'll later.


	4. The Stonning begins

A/N….. I'm an idiot. First off I haven't posted in who knows how long! Second NEJI, my favorite character, is ooc! Dammit! I'm such an idiot! How can I make Neji into an even bigger wanker? ::sniff::

Summary: Drunken-ness ensues

Rating: PG-13

::::::::::::::::::::::::::Begin::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Hi Neji and Hinata." Naruto called ,shakily, a blush still adorning his face.

"..h-hi..Na-Naruto." Hinata stuttered, shyly, half hidden behind an angry looking Neji.

"You're here for the games?" Naruto asked while raking his brain.

"Y-yes… Sa-sakura invited us." Hinata stuttered, hiding further behind Neji, and fidgeting with her fingers.

:::Flashback-y::

Sakura had ran ,screaming, to Ino the moment she was sure Sasuke would show up at Naruto's house. Even thought Sakura showed externally that she 'hated' the blond kunochi she really did consider Ino her best friend.

"Yes, he'll be there or else I would not get close that that house!" Sakura reassured the blond. Ino nodded at the pink haired girl and grabbed Shikamaru dragging him along too.

Shikamaru deemed it to troublesome to try and do something so he let himself be dragged along.

As they neared the hyper active ninja's house; the odd group met the Hyuuga cousins, Neji and Hinata.

"Hi Hinata " Ino and Sakura called, "hi Neji." Neji just looked at them while Hinata waved shyly.

"Hey, do you guys want to go over to Naruto's house to play games?" Sakura asked the cousins. 'If there are more people they'll all be too busy talking to each other and I'll have Sasuke all to myself!' Sakura thought mischievously.

"Na-Naruto-kun's h-house?" Hinata's eyes widened, cheeks flushed, fingers fidgeted, and bowed her head.

"Sure." Neji replied calmly. He knew his cousin really like the loudmouth. Even thought he would never admit it, not even to himself, Neji had a soft spot for his cousin. He decided the only way to make his cousin happy was to go to Naruto's house.

:::End Flashback-y thingy:::

"We're late because Hinata had to do her hair and nails." Neji pointed at the purple haired girl who was now almost completely hidden behind him.

"OKAY! Well come on in and sit down." Naruto moved out of the way so they could enter.

Everyone else was already in his or hers seat ready to play with such drunken energy. Naruto showed Neji and Hinata to the living room floor. They sat down Hinata next to Sasuke and Neji next to Sakura.

"Okay, well we are playing Truth or dare." Naruto stated, " but before we begin you guys have to get drunk." He went into his kitchen and began fumbling around looking in cupboards and random drawers. After much searching and items being thrown around Naruto gave a yell of triumph extracting the desired object from a top shelf. He held up a long transparent tube with a funnel connected to one end, triumphantly.

"Dobe, now where did you get that?" Sasuke asked with an eyebrow cocked in inquiry.

"Drunken guy." Naruto replied shrugging. He brought the odd item over to the circle of drunken shinobis.

"Who'll go first?" Naruto raised up the funnel part letting go of the tube it almost touched the floor he then motioned to a new bottle of sake on the floor. Both Hyuuga's pointed at each other looking at Naruto warily. The blond eyed the cousins with amusement in his eyes, from the entertainment it brought or from the sake no one could tell.

Naruto sighed shaking his head. " I'll choose", he replied before starting his ultra important choosing procedure, "Ini mini minny mo catch a shin obi by the toe if he kills you, you obviously let go ini mini minny mo you got killed!" he sang pointing his index finger at either of them each word. When he finished his finger pointed at a scowling Neji.

"Okay Neji you go first." Naruto shoved the funnel at him with a smile.

Neji knowing he couldn't say no, took the funnel. Shoving the end of the tube into his mouth he held up the funnel.

Naruto, giggling evilly, poured the sake into the funnel. Neji drank as fast as he could, the sake burning his throat slightly as it went down, trying to get consume all the sake he could. He took the tube out of his mouth when half the sake was gone. He coughed and sputtered, sake running down his chin, eyelids drooping badly, and his pearly eyes now blood shot. Apparently, Neji was another who couldn't contain his alcohol very well because he began to giggle madly as he handed the funnel back to Naruto. As Neji drank everyone's eyes were bugged out trying to comprehend where this newfound urge to drink had come from.

Naruto quickly put his thumb on the end of the tube to prevent spilling of anymore sake.

Naruto quickly handed the funnel to Hinata. She shyly took it, her hands shaking slightly. She put the tube to her lips and began drinking the rest of the sake. As the last drop of sake was gone everyone's jaws had already hit the floor in shock at the shy girls actions. What was to happen next would shake them worse than now.

Growling, Hinata, grabbed another bottle of sake and chugged, her eyes set, and her hands no longer shaking. She put down the bottle after consuming more than half of it's contents. All of the room's occupants, even in their drunken state, stared at the usually shy girl in shock.

"Nya! That was good Naruto-kun! But I want some action when are the games going to start?" Hinata exclaimed her voice no longer shaky or shy but confident and…flirty?!

"U-h..," Naruto responded staring at the purple haired girl mouth agape, he shook his head, "We can start now!" He then proceeded to explain the new rules again.

"I'll go first!" Hinata said boldly. No one wanted to deny her this moment of control so they said nothing. "Okay Shikamaru, truth, dare, double dare ,rainbow?"

"Truth." Shikamaru drawled lazily.

"Who would you rather fuck in the whole world?" Yet again everyone stared at the girl.

Shikamaru thought for a moment before answering, "Kiba, his triangles turn me on."

A crash was heard as a window broke, a white puppy had leaped/ been thrown through said window. Kiba leaping in through the window after his dog. Kiba went over, picked up Shikamaru, and carried him bridal style out the window. Shikamaru didn't struggle on account of it being troublesome and because it was Kiba. Akamaru shook himself off and leaped out the window after his master.

"Well you don't see that everyday." Iruka murmured. The rest nodded in agreement.

"Well since Shika left I'll take his turn." Lee said giving a thumbs up and smiling his teeth giving off a gleam, "Sasuke truth or dare…ect."

"Dare."

"I dare you to eat grass."

"But I have to go outside." The Uchiha whined.

"No you don't. I happen to have some grass with me. I found it on the floor, it's grass. Actually it's cut and dried grass in a plastic bag. Who would put cut grass in a plastic bag?" Neji pulled out a small plastic bag out of his back pocket and handed it to Sasuke.

Sasuke shrugged taking the bag from Neji, heck he was drunk.

Opening the bag he emptied the contents into his mouth, chewed , and swallowed. He sat there for a few seconds before his eyes closed and fell back in a dead faint.

"Oh fuck! We killed Sasuke!" Naruto yelled, his hands on the sides of his face. Sakura and Ino shrieked hugging each other their round firm breasts brushing against each other. They could both feel their hardening nipples through each other's thin clothing. (1)

Pale eyelids opened to reveal bloodshot onyx eyes. Sasuke grunted got up and shook his head slowly trying to focus his eye sight.

"Hey man I'm hungry", Hey rubbed his bare stomach while looking around. Once he say his face reddened for two seconds before he let out a big laugh.

"HA!..PINK HAIR!…WHAT THE HELL!!?! IT'S SOO FUNNY!" He wheezed in between laughing.

:::::::::::::::::::::end:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

A/N Meh okay well that's the end of chapter…4. Yup, Sasuke is stoned, drunk, and half naked. You may ask why Naruto hasn't taken advantage of Sasuke already…well lets just say Naruto had values? WTF? Just kidding. Well maybe stuff will happen in the next chapter.

(1)… I'm in a Yuri mood…don't kill meee!!!


	5. Roar!

**_A/N Sorry, I haven't updated in over a year…I think. The reason I haven't been updating is for two reasons. One reason is I've been in a slump and my writing creativity has gone down the drain. Swirly swirly. Another reason is I've been a bit too busy doing…stuff? Yeah, I've been busy. So if this chapter sucks blame my slump. I still haven't regained myself from it also you guys might notice a change in my style man I have no idea what's wrong with me. Ack, I hope this chapter doesn't suck too much that it will cause people to stop reading. I will get better! I swear!...or at least I hope. Well anyways, this is almost the last chapter._**

**_I would like to say thanks to Lethe for being my Beta. If anything is wrong or there are mistakes blame HIM!_**

**_Reviews_**

**_Ruby Heart: Lol yeah. I tried to make Hinata this outgoing girl wild and crazy drunk. Because her real personality pisses me off. -_**

**_Yit-Ha : Not TeH pitchfork:gonk: Yup, that was weed SassyPants ate. XD_**

**_Spirit Of The Moon: Thanks, I try. It's all good, even a "good job" or "you suck" is good enough for me._**

**_TheSunshineGirls: lol, okay._**

**_Nyuuu: I will! Neji is the awesome! O.o okay._**

**_Hurricane-rider: Lol. I know, but I usually don't write yuri._**

**_Anonymous: Okay Sure._**

**_Chinese Fairy: Sorry:gonk: I was in a slump. Gaara comes out in this chapter._**

**_Yeah: Okay. He comes out here._**

**_rune-chan: Gaara is here now DX_**

**_DogsruleW: Yup, thanks._**

**_Ichigo-Dattebayo : In a slump. DX_**

**_Accolay :He's here now._**

**_KikitheKitsune : o.O…eep! Shukaku!_**

: Okay Now Start Reading:

"Uh, Sasuke are you okay?" Sakura asked her cheeks a bit red from having her crush laugh at her pink hair.

"Sasuke your acting weird," Ino stated, "Neji what did you give him?"

"Grass", Neji said shrugging, "I think the guy who dropped it said it had weeds."

"Maybe the alcohol just went to his head." Naruto suggested looking over at Sasuke pointing and laughing at Neji's eyes while a vein popped on Neji's forehead.

"I'm hungry, and I think that little gnome in the corner wants to play." Sasuke slurred pointing at an empty corner.

Everyone sweat dropped while Sakura and Ino were worried over him so much they hadn't noticed. They were still holding each other.

Sasuke looked at them not doing anything to satisfy his hunger.

"I'm hungry." Sasuke whined, rubbing his eye letting a stray giggle escape his lips. "Wait.." he said smelling the air towards Naruto.

"You smell good." Naruto looked taken aback by Sasuke's comment.

"Ne... Sasuke what's wrong?" Naruto asked slightly edging away from said raven haired boy.

"I wonder if you taste good too."

"NANI!" was heard from everyone. The stoned boy took no notice of the shouts though as he leaned forward and firmly pressed his lips against the fox boys rosy pink ones.

Naruto's eyes widened while his mind froze completely and his body got stiff. A second later Sasuke pulled away licking his lips. Everyone stared wide eyed and slack jawed at both boys.

Naruto tentatively touched his slightly red lips with a shaking hand still feeling a tingling sensation. Without warning Naruto pounced on Sasuke ravaging his lips. The fox boy licked Sasuke's lips demanding entry which the boy beneath him happily complied to.

Naruto laid on top of the dark haired boy completely keeping him in place. An orange clad leg softly rubbed the bare pale leg on the boy beneath his. Sasuke calmly laid on the floor letting the other boy have his way with him. Naruto ran a hand down Sasuke's side feeling the creamy skin.

Sakura, Ino, and the others stared at the display with wide eyes. Tears leaked from both of the girls eyes freely down their cheeks comically.

"Sasukekun!" Both girls wailed hugging each other, tears continuing to spill. Iruka and Kakashi giggled and turned around having a little fun for themselves. A deep blush formed on one of the Hyuugas' cheeks while Hinata looked on enthusiastically.

The boys stopped both panting and flushed, pulling apart a few inches.

"Sasuke I…"Naruto began.

Naruto was interrupted by a loud crashing noise! Someone had leaped through another window, incredulously right next to the one Kiba jumped through. Why they couldn't jump in through the already broken window no one knew. The dark hooded figure stood up tall and mighty. Shards of broken glass fell from his black cloak.

Everyone stared mouth agape and wide eyed at the new comer. No one could move from the initial shock.

"Roar!" yelled the dark cloaked figure in a deep horrible voice. One, two, three everyone drops dead…in a faint.

"Oopsie", said the stranger removing his hood. It was…Orochimaru! "I didn't mean to scare them that much." He surveyed his surroundings and took a step forward.

Suddenly from the window comes flying a second figure. The red hair, green eyes, and dark circles around the eyes gave Gaara away although not as much as the huge gourd on his back did.

"Yeah right ", the red head scowled, "you love scaring everyone. Otherwise you wouldn't be so ugly or have that tongue."

"I'm not ugly." The Sannin pouted. He took a few more steps forward staggering a bit. He stuck his hand into one of the cloak pockets to extract a small white bottle. Gaara eyed him and the bottle.

"Share!" the red head whined extending his hand out.

"No, mine" Orochimaru retorted putting the bottle to his lips.

"You better not."

"Oh what If I do?"

"I'll kill…" Gaara stopped in mid-sentence as he spotted something. More like someone. The most beautiful someone ever! "Hyuuga" He whispered.

Completely and immediately forgetting Orochimaru and the sake Gaara made a beeline for the small passed out form of 'Hyuuga' on the other side of the room. Upon reaching them he knelt down beside them. Looking over them Gaara couldn't help but feel slightly light headed and his heart racing.

Pearl eyes flutter open and a small moan erupted form their mouth. A few second later noticing the intruder peering at them Hyuuga screams!

"Oh no! oh no! What do I do?" Gaara panicked.

Silence.

"You know you could have used your hand." Orochimaru half slurred half groaned throwing the bottle aside.

Gaara, leaning down pressing his lips against Neji's to keep him quiet, hadn't thought of using his hand as Orochimaru had suggested.

Neji's eyes widened even more and his eyebrows flew up. Even thought the sudden action surprised him it most certainly kept him quiet. Gaara's eyes meet Neji's and in sync their eyes closed.

A swirl of emotions swept past Neji colliding, contradicting, and confusing until finally ending in enjoyment, entertaining, and joyful.

Gaara was feeling exactly the same. Daringly, he slipped his tongue out to lick rosy lips beneath his. Shivers went down his back, goose bumps formed on his arms, while his pants tightened ever so slightly.

Meanwhile, Neji responded to the licking in a way Gaara would have never expected, his let his tongue meet Gaara's in a velvety kiss. Neji brought his arms out to pull Gaara down onto of himself and Gaara's went up to his hair entangling themselves in the chocolate locks. Unexplainable sensations coursed through both boys bodies as they lay there kissing, feeling each others warmth, completely at ease.

Neji pulled away slowly, "I..."

He was interrupted by someone bursting through the door loudly breaking it clean off the hinges.

"AHHHH!" they yelled in what sounded like agony but to the drunken mind of Neji it sound as a battle cry.

Even though his mind registered as stupid to fall unconscious a second time especially with a madman, in his opinion, in the vicinity his body didn't listen and shut it's self down. Gaara felt Neji go limp in his arms and turned glaring at the intruder.

Long black flowing hair, dark red eyes, and the lines under his eyes gave Itachi away. Even thought his attire told differently. Yup, footie pajamas with the infamous red Akatsuki cloud print on them was most definitely something no one would have ever pictured Uchiha Itachi wearing. His glaring eyes, scowling lips, and hips on hands were directed at a particularly drunk sannin.

"Hey baby," Orochimaru slurred taking a few stumbling steps towards Itachi, "what are you...Ack!" He stumbled and fell on his creepily white face.

**_A/N Hope you liked. And please review! I'm a review whore! Also if you review I might get around to typing more of this thing. Also review my other fics! Or I might go Emo and do stuff. And I bet you don't want that. Or at least some of you…You all Hate meee! –sob- I apoligize for the shortness of this chapter. I split this chapter into two so I could update faster, otherwise it would have taken me another week to finish._**


End file.
